How many times have we cancelled a coffee date with a friend, flaked on a social gathering, not answered a phone call or replied to a friend’s email because it takes up much needed “valuable” time from our favorite T.V show, or requires us to leave the comforts of our own home, the couch and covers? Has commitment become an inconvenience?
One too many cancellations and broken promises have often left my heart sore and my mind confused, filled with questions, and seeking answers.
What is commitment?
Commitment is a state of quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity etc. according to the dictionary.
Synonyms of commitment include: “guarantee”, “promise”, “word”, “vow”, “devotion”, “loyalty”, and “faithfulness.”
When I think of commitment my heart screams: “Investing yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally in something or someone.” When we commit to something or someone we place our whole heart, mind and soul into it. We don’t hold back. We place our full energy and attention into it.
Yes, perhaps commitment means selflessly and willingly making individual sacrifices.
What if commitment means giving up on things we might desire short-term to potentially gain something of greater value in the long-term? How willing are we to give up short-term momentary joys to potentially gain something of even greater value? Do you value friendship? Relationship? Community?
Silently, I ask myself: “does your value to commitment reflect how you value our relationship? Because if it does, where does that leave me standing? Behind a door that’s just been slammed in my face. My heart hurts to knock again. My flesh is angry, my hand shakes as I dare to knock again, in fear that you may not answer, or slam the door again.
But this got me thinking. The day we gave our lives to Christ, we made a commitment to Him right? Yet daily, we slam the door in His face. Daily we sin against Him. Daily we hurt Him. Yet what is His response to us?
GRACE. A kindness we don’t deserve. Freely given, unmerited love.
Over the last few months I’ve watched as a sweet friend receives many slammed doors in her face, knocking her to her knees. Yet, I stand in awe as she just gets back up and continues to knock. She continues to love no matter how much hurt and rejection she receives. I asked: “How do you keep getting back up and continue pursuing?” Her reply: “I just can’t stop loving.” A beautiful example of Father God’s Grace towards us. How many times have we failed him? How many times have we sinned against Him, daily? Yet He continues to love us. He continues to shower us with His free gift, unmerited favor and love. So undeserving.
Learning to give Grace when my heart hurts is my attempt to let go, and love like Jesus. So if you slam that door in my face again, know that it hurts, but I’m going to knock again. I will stand to my feet with a Grace that only comes from above, with a love that I’m only able to give because of Christ in me. And if I slam the door in your face, please give me grace and knock again.
“Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends.” – Revelation 3:20